Anger in and of itself is an Unpretty emotion. Yet many of us mommas have to struggle with it. Angry momma leads to snappy momma which in turn leads to guilty momma.
Anger is such an ugly ugly emotion. It can cause mental as well as physical reactions that in most cases, if gone unchecked, will end in tears, either for you or those you love the most.
When we are angry, we actually trigger our most basic instincts. Fight or Flight.
Your heart rate goes up, you tense up in your neck and jaw and your breathing becomes more rapid. Every seen yourself in the mirror when your angry? Red face, nostrals flarring. Soooo Unpretty.
If we haven’t resolved our issues or at least calmed down before bed, we can easier spend hours up late thinking about the reasons we were pissed off in the first place and this just brings it all back to the surface. Hello insomnia!
So how do we deal with shit that just makes us mad?
Here is how I work through it:
1 – Breath – Not just snorting want to head butt someone breathing. I take long deep breaths in through my nose and out through my nose. As I do this I focus on each breath and on my heart, ensuring that I am brining it back to a normal rythum.
2 – Acknowledge – Acknowledging the emotion takes away so much of its spark. So I say to myself ‘ok, I am feeling really pissed off right now at blah blah or because blah blah happened.
3 – Think – Think through why you were angry in the first place. Was it just one incident? I doubt it, if your anything like most of us, it will be a sequence of events to lead up to this finale stage.
4 – Ask – Ask yourself one question. Is getting angry going to change whats happened? Answer is? NO! Sure getting angry and lashing out will let off a bit of steam, but think about the people in your firing line that pay the price for you not being able to come down from this hissy fit.
5 – Fuck it – my personal favorite step. I sit there and just say ‘fuck it’. Oh, and a glass of wine (or a bottle or 3) at the end of this process would be a great way to reward yourself for being cool, calm and collected!
Have any tips of your own about how you talk yourself down from the edge? Maybe you just jumped to the alcoholic beverage?
If you try my above steps I would love to know how they worked, or didn’t work for you.